“Begin Lockdown Procedures Now!”

There are damaging, long-term effects of school shootings on the adults our children will become.

As I sat there, trying to keep any sign of fear at bay, I found myself eyeing the room, moving through different scenarios in my mind to figure out the best way to move my body so as to shield the kids from the bullets we waited for.

As soon as we heard the loud, Bang! several of my 4th graders yelled, “What was THAT?” and ran to the window to investigate. We could smell the acrid smoke as it wafted through the open windows of our second-floor classroom. I called them back just as the intercom came on with the frightening, familiar sound of the lockdown chimes. Then, “THIS IS NOT A DRILL! BEGIN LOCKDOWN PROCEDURES NOW!”.  We knew exactly what to do; thankfully, albeit, sadly. They moved like a perfectly synchronized flock of birds against the long wall and sat down with bent knees, their arms folded over downed heads. I crawled over to the first door leading to the hallway and reached up to lock it, careful not to show myself through the clear glass on the top half. I flicked the lights off as I crawled to the other side of the room and did the same to that door. I smiled gently at each fearful face as I crawled past them, sat down in the middle of their row against the wall, and fell into position. Suddenly, a pounding on our classroom door shattered our silence and we all yelped in unison. The principal came running down the hall violently banging on the doors and shaking doorknobs yelling, “Stay Down!” We simultaneously moved in closer to one another. The only sound was labored breathing and the occasional sniffs. As I sat there, trying to keep any sign of fear at bay, I found myself eyeing the room, moving through different scenarios in my mind to figure out the best way to move my body so as to shield the kids from the bullets we waited for.

Lockdown

Thankfully, the event ended without anyone hurt, physically. The gunman did not enter the school after all. Although for the longest 15 minutes of my life, I didn’t know that. The entire school retreated to the safe area at the basement level, we called it the “Community Room’. The youngest children at our school were pre-K, 4-5 year-olds. Their cries from the other side along with a smattering of many others across the room, chilled me to the bone. As police surrounded the school searching for the suspect, the rumor spread that he had rammed into a car, jumped out, shot someone, and ran through the alley near the school. We had no idea how long it would take. Because it was against policy to send any notifications to families during a lockdown, I could only imagine what the families were going through outside. I’ve never felt my heart pound so loud in my ears before.

I don’t remember how long we were down there. I snuck a text to my wife to let her know I was ok. She asked if there was anything she could bring us, some food or water. But no one was allowed in the school or out.

Finally, after the shooter was apprehended we were released and allowed back to our respective classrooms as students’ names began to be called for release over the intercom, it was close to 6 pm. The process for release that evening would take hours. Each parent had to show identification and then a school employee had to physically escort students to the only exit allowed to be used. Each parent matched with a student or students, had to be verified.  

Effects

A lot of us went home that night and hugged our families close. For me, it didn’t hit until I laid down to sleep. I cried, sobbed really, feeling the release of the tension I held in my body all of those hours. The realization that at work that day, I had to think about how to shield my students from bullets. I sobbed for every child and every teacher, every school worker who has lost their life to this gun disease. I cried for the children who would relive that experience each time the bell rang. 

Every teacher, in every classroom, in every city, town, and borough, would take a bullet for their students. Many have, and no doubt many more will. I won’t repeat all of the stats, we hear them daily. We’ve become desensitized and disbelieving, demoralized, and denounced for calling for stricter gun laws.

Educator Wanted: Must have combat training

As educators of your children, we now have to add protecting our students and ourselves from gun violence to our job duties. It isn’t enough that we spend seven hours a day educating, disciplining, supporting, advising, nursing, feeding, and guiding them. Isn’t it enough that we do this against the blockades of non-educator parents who want to tell us how to do our jobs, against administrations that demean and devalue us, and against a society that believes that the uneducated masses are much more American!?

If we are willing to take a bullet for them, don’t you think you can trust us to do the work we have been educated and trained to do? You can’t have it both ways. 

Robbing Kids of Carefree Childhoods

School shootings are a harrowing reality that has plagued our society for far too long. While not all incidents result in mass casualties, the mere thought of such an event is enough to strike fear into the hearts of parents, teachers, and students alike. False alarms, adjacent events, and frequent lockdown drills further erode our sense of safety and well-being.

The lasting impact of these tragedies extends beyond the immediate aftermath. They leave a profound psychological imprint on our children, one that can shape their worldviews and impact their ability to form meaningful relationships. When combined with the isolation and divisiveness of social media and remote communication, we face a crisis of interpersonal relationships.

It is incumbent upon us to ask ourselves what effect this is having on our children’s psychology and their ability to relate to the world. If we do not take action to address this, the consequences could be dire. The bonds that enable us to understand and empathize with others are formed through shared experiences, conversations, and shared meals. These bonds are essential in creating peaceful and cohesive communities.

Therefore, we must take a proactive stance to ensure that our children are not robbed of these essential experiences. We must work to create safe, nurturing environments that allow our children to form these critical bonds. Only then can we hope to stem the tide of divisiveness and create a brighter, more peaceful future for all.

What is your story of gun violence in schools? Share your story. Let everyone know, tell it over and over. Write your legislators. Stop the American disease of gun violence.

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